When it comes to having tolerance in relationships when you want to smack someone how do we consciously navigate relationship issues in challenging situations?
In dating and relationships, our buttons get pushed… period. How do we navigate this rocky terrain? Furthermore, how do we use a fair, objective, and permissive attitude toward those whose opinions and beliefs will inevitably differ from our own? Even if we believe we got “lucky” and are in a successful relationship, or it feels like life is really going our way, how do we avoid the pitfalls when…
Others Push us Beyond our Capacity for Tolerance in Relationships?
On the path to relationship transformation, the very act of judgment destroys honesty and shatters trust. When it comes to tolerance, the power to endure through the process of dating and relationships depends on our ability to use discernment in lieu of judgment . . .
Which Ultimately leads to Self-Deception or Self-Actualization
Obtaining the attribute of tolerance in relationships requires a lot of practice while on the path to integrating your authentic Self. Every time we are tempted to judge another because they don’t meet one of our expectations, we have to remember to switch our inner dialogue from,
You aren’t good enough . . . to. . . Can I be good here?
You see, on the path to discovering our authentic Selves, we don’t really know what we want, until we begin realizing the truth of who we are and then acting on it. This takes practice….lots and lots of practice. So, going through the “challenge” in order to gain experience is simply just part of the learning process. A Course of Love states it this way, Experience was required in order to alter your belief system and is required now as well. The only way to make the unbelievable believable is to alter what you experience.
So, do something different!
Tolerance in relationships falls in the third phase of personality integration. Therefore, at this stage, all we can do is begin looking for the opportunity to practice discernment. Our knee-jerk reaction when things don’t go our way is to kick someone to the curb and continue our search for that one special person who won’t push our buttons but rather make life roll like a romantic Hollywood script.
It’s time to challenge this belief and realize it is in the moment a relationship issue arises which is…
I can tell you unequivocally every time your ego will convince you that your crisis is unique and different and you will be tempted to dismiss the person in front of you as not worth the effort. This is what A Course in Miracles calls the “special relationship”. Furthermore, if you don’t recognize the opportunity to create a change by shifting your perception and allowing yourself to go through this process you will be unable to experience a different outcome and continue perpetuating the revolving door of relationship disappointment.
Further Known as the Lack of Tolerance in Relationships
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